The Basic Ingredients of Parenting #1

Respect

{Excerpt from Purposeful Parenting}

Children must be taught to respect authority in general and your authority specifically. This is non negotiable and not up to the child’s consideration. This is one of those, “This is the way we do it in our home,” things. This respect is not earned, it is given because of the authority of one’s position. We teach children to respect parents because they are the parents, respect older siblings because they are older, respect elders, respect teachers, respect people in authority. We may not like the president of the United States but out of respect for his office, we do not denigrate him with our words. They may not like their teacher but they will respect them as an adult and person in charge. This means they will not talk back, verbally dishonor, be rude to etc. If they have an issue they will address it civilly and at the appropriate time or bring it to parents to address on their behalf. These things are not left to the child to determine if the person is worthy of respect.

This means they will not talk back, verbally dishonor, be rude to etc.

A disrespectful child exalts self. They overestimate their value and the value of their input and ideas. They justify rude and disobedient behavior based on circumstances that did not have a favorable outcome to them. This is why a child can find logic, when they are disciplined for doing something wrong, in responding “But everyone else was doing it and you didn’t discipline them.” As if discipline is not a consequence of your bad actions, but rather an issue of fairness that should only be implemented when the persecutor deems appropriate. One of the reasons many children struggle to respect their parents as they become young adults (aka teenagers) is that it wasn’t expected or demanded of them, thereby it wasn’t taught to them. If children are not taught to respect their parents authority there will be struggle in their soul to find stability in life. They will feel aimless and without a compass. They will not feel the necessity to do or accomplish much in life.

Respect leads to purpose and direction.